Because we should own our triumphs as well as our failures/lows

[bop_radar]

I should have remembered that fandom 'lows' often come right before the highs... in this case I have bounced back from my slump with something to celebrate. And while I am shy, I'm also too euphoric about this not to share. (And also I *do* think everyone should 'own' their successes when they have them--even though I usually suck at doing so myself.)

sockkpuppett was asked to do a follow-up to her New York Magazine feature last year, by choosing 5 of her favourite 2008 vids to feature in a year-end round up. And she chose Clint Eastwood among them!

Honoured doesn't begin to cover it. It is tremendously exciting to see one of my vids alongside vids from some of my own personal vidding idols. All the vids and vidders featured are amazing and you should totally check them out.

I feel like I'm living a fannish fairytale! :D It's only two years since I began vidding (nearly exactly) and before that there had been a couple of years of watching vids obsessively but never daring to dream I'd make one. Vidding has been an amazing gift to my life because it is my first ever creative 'outlet', I never saw myself as a creative person before, and the personal satisfaction I draw from vidding, even when it is hard, is something that has brought me so much joy.

Like all fairy-tales, I feel this one has a moral or message, or maybe several:
--We all begin somewhere. My first vid was not so flash, but it started me on my path and I know I've come a long way since then both in technique and creatively. So to new vidders out there: you don't know what you're capable of until you try!
--Stick through the tough times. I despaired while making this vid (and others!) many a time. For that, I am grateful to my fannish friends for 'being there', even indirectly. Sometimes being able to share a joke at the end of a long vidding session (even if they didn't know that's what it was) was exactly what I needed to keep going.
--Take a leap of faith (in your beta)! I very nearly bailed on submitting this vid to Vidukon. I'd had to redraft a third of it within the last two days before deadline, and on the deadline day I flung it before supacat to check if it was 'good enough'. (She tried to assure me it was more than that but I was way far gone in despair and did not listen! Betas put up with a LOT. *hugs her*)
--Non-vidders: never be afraid to share your vid bunnies! Without wisteria_ sowing the seed in my head, 'Clint Eastwood' might never have been made.
--Vids have a life of their own once 'released' to the world. I was surprised by the warmth of reception this one received because I had lost all perspective on it myself. But I am delighted. You can't predict these things, all you can do is keep laying stuff down on the timeline, gulping coffee, and listening to your beta. ;)

Thank you also to all my kind and generous friends who left feedback on this or other vids (or to my last oh-so-emo post!), to all the vidders who inspire me, to my boyfriend for being so supportive of my hobby, and to my dog... and um... *gets dragged off stage by awards organisers* ;p

Comments

[redteekal.livejournal.com]

Way to go Bop! Huge congrats to you...and most warmly deserved too. Just watched Clint Eastwood and somehow you have renewed my flagging interest in BSG. I want to know what happens to Gaius simply because your vid has given me some new perspective on his character. For a character who has always left a somewhat bitter after taste in my mouth that's no easy feat. WELL DONE!!!!

[bop-radar.livejournal.com]

Wow! That's pretty cool that I managed to do that given that my own interest is flagging. ;) I *do* want to know what happens to Gaius though! And I have had a very rocky time with him--I used to hate him, but he's a fascinating construct and I really REALLY want to know what Head!Six's agenda with him is. I developed a lot more compassion for him through vidding him.