read it as her being the one person (of the four who explicitly expressed concern over Clark's emotional shutdown in this--Martha, Chloe, Lex, and Lana) who actually had a *shot* at getting Clark to open up, so that's what she was trying to do). I think she thinks that, but I also think the writers think that.
I disagree, because the writers actually did have Clark open up to someone without much prompting: Chloe. He told her at the beginning of the episode about his guilt, the way he could barely look at his mom or his dad's things. And later in the episode, Chloe was the person to whom he confessed how good it felt to throttle Snake even though he ultimately knew and understood that killing Snake wouldn't be right or make him feel better. Clark actually wasn't completely closing off here, and the confession of the *guilt* is actually the most complicated (whereas sadness and anger are emotions most people expect others to feel when they unexpectedly lose a loved one, to the point that people don't need to *say* "I feel angry" or "I feel sad"; it's just understood people will feel these things in the wake of a loved one's death; *guilt* is different, though, and it's more complicated). So I disagree that the writers felt like Lana was one person with the best shot of getting him to open up (especially when the entirety of their relationship problems have been about the fact that Clark ... doesn't open up to her).**
I do, however, agree that *Lana* believed this to be the case, and I think that's what lies at the heart of my annoyance with her. If she hadn't just broken up with him, I think her believing this would make a lot of sense, and would even, on some level, be justified (as I said elsewhere, a significant other *does* get to say "Honey, please don't shut me out on this"; an *ex*-SO? not so much, IMO). But she did just break up with him, and I can't help but feel like Lana should understand that maybe even if Clark wanted to talk about all of this, he wouldn't necessarily want to talk about it *with her*.
** I'll acknowledge here that this whole issue also pushes a personal button of mine, which is that I don't buy into the pop psychology philosophy that the best or only way to properly process one's emotions grief -- or one's emotions in general -- is by being open and effusive with them as opposed to being reticent and withdrawn.
Withdrawal into one's self, reticence to speak of how one is feeling ... these are perfectly valid coping and grieving mechanisms. So I didn't like the suggestion that Clark isn't properly processing his grief because he doesn't want to talk about it to anyone/everyone willing to listen. And I partly felt like Lana was trying to tell him the proper way to grieve and that's just ... there *is* no baseline "right" or "wrong" way to grieve, and Clark's not somehow being dsyfunctional because he isn't processing his grief the way the other characters think he should be.
no subject
I disagree, because the writers actually did have Clark open up to someone without much prompting: Chloe. He told her at the beginning of the episode about his guilt, the way he could barely look at his mom or his dad's things. And later in the episode, Chloe was the person to whom he confessed how good it felt to throttle Snake even though he ultimately knew and understood that killing Snake wouldn't be right or make him feel better. Clark actually wasn't completely closing off here, and the confession of the *guilt* is actually the most complicated (whereas sadness and anger are emotions most people expect others to feel when they unexpectedly lose a loved one, to the point that people don't need to *say* "I feel angry" or "I feel sad"; it's just understood people will feel these things in the wake of a loved one's death; *guilt* is different, though, and it's more complicated). So I disagree that the writers felt like Lana was one person with the best shot of getting him to open up (especially when the entirety of their relationship problems have been about the fact that Clark ... doesn't open up to her).**
I do, however, agree that *Lana* believed this to be the case, and I think that's what lies at the heart of my annoyance with her. If she hadn't just broken up with him, I think her believing this would make a lot of sense, and would even, on some level, be justified (as I said elsewhere, a significant other *does* get to say "Honey, please don't shut me out on this"; an *ex*-SO? not so much, IMO). But she did just break up with him, and I can't help but feel like Lana should understand that maybe even if Clark wanted to talk about all of this, he wouldn't necessarily want to talk about it *with her*.
** I'll acknowledge here that this whole issue also pushes a personal button of mine, which is that I don't buy into the pop psychology philosophy that the best or only way to properly process one's emotions grief -- or one's emotions in general -- is by being open and effusive with them as opposed to being reticent and withdrawn.
Withdrawal into one's self, reticence to speak of how one is feeling ... these are perfectly valid coping and grieving mechanisms. So I didn't like the suggestion that Clark isn't properly processing his grief because he doesn't want to talk about it to anyone/everyone willing to listen. And I partly felt like Lana was trying to tell him the proper way to grieve and that's just ... there *is* no baseline "right" or "wrong" way to grieve, and Clark's not somehow being dsyfunctional because he isn't processing his grief the way the other characters think he should be.